african-american-woman-stressed

 

“A wise woman recognizes when her life is out of balance and summons the courage to act to correct it, she knows the meaning of true generosity, happiness is the reward for a life lived in harmony with courage and grace.” -Suzy Orman

 

There I was again at 3:45 in the morning and my mind was someplace where it had no business. My mind continued to trail back to my work desk and the stack of paperwork; I hadn’t had a chance to look over, or the work I had completed praying that I hadn’t made any errors. I hoped that I remembered to do everything I intended to do, and that the work day approaching would go smoothly with very little or no stressful occurrences.

 

What was I doing? Why was I thinking about work when I should have been resting? Why couldn’t I turn it off? This was so unfair to my family. They deserved me to be well rested and present when I was with them. I continued to reprimand myself for allowing my work life to blend into my home life. Something had to give and I knew it. I was going to burn out if I didnt find balance.

 

There it was the first step. I identified there was indeed a problem. I committed myself to working on a solution. While doing research on the internet, and speaking with other working women, I found out that I was not alone, this was a common problem. Due to the added stress of the restructuring of companies, downsizing and cut backs, we began to act from a place of fear, placing our health and family life at risk.

 

The first sign of my problem was once while driving; out of the blue I experienced my first anxiety attack. The thing was it was one of the few times, I wasn’t thinking about anything. I soon found out that it was due to the fact that my mind began to panic due to the lack of mental turbulence. Since then I noticed my breathing wasn’t the same, it was at more of a rapid pace and focusing was no longer one of my strong points. I was moody allot more and overly emotional.

 

I knew it was time for me to reprioritize what was really important and what really mattered. The truth of the matter is and was, if I were to drop dead at my desk, I would be mourned for about a week, and the business would go on. I would be replaced easily. My family on the other hand would have a harder time replacing a wife and mother. That thought alone made me come to my senses. I had to be honest, I am not super woman and I can’t, nor do I want to do it all.

 

I have since cut back on the hours I am at work. I have joined a yoga class. I have also subscribed to the notion, what will be simply will be. I can only do my best. If I put forth my best effort, Karma and the law of intention will take care of the rest. I can’t worry or entertain any thoughts of what tomorrow will bring. The best thing I can do is be present in the moment that I currently exist.

 

 

STACKS Magazine would like to give a warm welcome to our newest writer, Kenya Bonner.  Kenya lives in Chicago, Illinois and will virtually join our Content Writers team.  This article was submitted by her and reflects her own personal journey.

 

Welcome to the team Kenya!!